(NOTE: The following review will contain minor spoilers necessary solely for the discussion of plot and/or characters.  If you’re the type of reader who prefers a review entirely spoiler-free, then I’d encourage you to skip down to the last few paragraphs for the final assessment.  If, however, you’re accepting of a few modest hints at ‘things to come,’ then read on …)
 
From the film’s IMDB.com page citation:
“Two best friends go back in time to kill Hitler when he was a child. When all turns haywire, the two turn to their mutual love Mary Jane, to help them on their epic adventure to save the world from evil. Until.”
 
Mind you: there’s an inherent risk associated with humanizing any vile dictator from human history, and there always will be.
 
For example, 2019’s awarding-winning Jojo Rabbit toyed with the idea of presenting none other than Adolf Hitler as little more than an imaginary friend to young Jojo Betzler, a good-natured child trying to make his way through 1939’s Nazi Germany.  The satire wasn’t exactly well-received by the meat-and-potatoes crowd (i.e. regular folks) but was a bit of a darling for the cultural elite.  Though it was no box office failure in any estimation, the feel-good story of a kid looking to the Great Leader as a source of inspiration (that he somewhat overcomes) just didn’t quite resonate as anything more than a Progressive exercise.  Recasting a mass murderer under the fabric of Comedy works fine for some, but it’ll rarely find an audience where Jack and Jill haven’t forgotten their world history and the crimes associated to it.
 
Enter 2017’s Raising Hitler, a web-series that kinda/sorta had a similar jumping off point, that being of re-examining ‘Herr Wolf’ by taking viewers back to the days of his youth were young Adi was a victim of an overbearing father.  Jesse Wagnon (played by Lucas Englander) and Mickey Applebaum (Ziad El May) – the two time-traveling stoners who believe they’re doing the world a favor by going back to drown the would-be ruler in a river – can’t help but pity the child, so much so that Mickey absconds with the kid in hopes of, instead, raising him as his own in hopes that a stronger nurturing might remove all thoughts of genocide from the still-developing mind.  The comic rub?  Well, both Jesse and Mickey are Jewish; and by trying to do good by their faith they inevitably learn that antisemitism paired with murderous intent could very well result in someone else picking up the Fuhrer’s original schtick and running with it anyway.  The world they created is even worse, making little Adi into little more than the lesser of two evils.
 
As is always the case, there’s a bit more to the action here, but what I’ve recounted is the basic premise that’s been built for laughs.  Sadly, said laughs are few and far between – well, unless you’re the kind of viewer who finds it funny every single time someone lights a doobie (I’m not) – but this isn’t to suggest that Raising Hitler doesn’t have some technical and creative merits.  It’s all expertly assembled and, frankly, looks far better than it should.  Because so much of what’s in here feels like a comic skit that grew proportionally larger than what was possible, it all ends up feeling like a project in transition: there likely wasn’t enough money to go as big as they wanted, so the finished product earns its stripes by sticking to the slim pickings of an idea with nothing extra.  That’s sad because I think the ending suggests that the writers might’ve had a more interesting destination if it were continued, but otherwise what remains makes for a palatable enough distraction to be a one-off experience.
 
Raising Hitler (2017) was produced by BlackPills.  DVD distribution (for this particular release) has been handled by the fine folks at Darkside Releasing.  As for the technical specifications?  While I’m no trained video expert, I can still assure readers that the provided sights and sounds are actually quite impressive, especially given the fact that all of this began its creative life as little more than a web-series.  It all looks really, really good, so don’t be put off by the presentation at all.  Lastly, if you’re looking for special features?  Sorry, Charlie, but this is a bare bones release with nothing but the flick and some trailers.
 
Alas … only Mildly Recommended.
 
Essentially a ‘stoner Comedy’ and little else, Raising Hitler (2017) clearly set the bar so high that it really couldn’t quite deliver on its idea, that being of two knuckleheads traveling back in time with the purpose of killing li’l Adolf but getting uncharacteristically won over by the dour munchkin’s attitude (with no reasonable explanation).  Though the prospects for bigger laughs were there (i.e. child actor Moritz Hoyer makes the most of a one-note performance as the ‘kid who would be The Fuhrer’), the web series turned 60+ minute movie just never amounted to more than the comedy sketch construct.  Even worse, one might suggest that it ends on a cliffhanger that needed closure for any of what came before to work … and now almost a decade later audiences are still waiting for any plausible explanation.  Sigh.
 
In the interests of fairness, I’m pleased to disclose that the fine folks at Allied Vaughn provided me with a complimentary Blu-ray of Raising Hitler (2017) by request for the expressed purpose of completing this review.  Their contribution to me in no way, shape, or form influenced my opinion of it.

-- EZ
​

So many movies ... so little time ...

On this day in 2013 (in the U.S.), television audiences were treated to the broadcast premiere of Chupacabra Vs The Alamo.  Directed by Terry Ingram from a story by Peter Sullivan and Jeffrey Schenck, the film starred Erik Estrada, Julia Benson, Jorge Vargas, and others. 

According to our friends at IMDB.com, here's the plot summary:

"San Antonio, Texas. The bodies of various drug cartel members are turning up mangled and drained of blood. Tough DEA agent Carlos Seguin discovers that the grisly murders are being committed by a pack of chupacabras, which are lethal predatory creatures of local legend. Carlos, his feisty new partner Tracy Taylor, wayward estranged son Tommy, and several others make a desperate last stand against the bloodthirsty beasts at the famous fort The Alamo."

-- EZ

Readers, over the weekend word reached the World Wide Web regarding the news of actress Carrie Anne Fleming's passing, and I wanted to get up a post this morning honoring the woman's contributions to the world of genre entertainment.  While certainly not a marquee name, she was definitely the kind of talent who worked valiantly in small roles here and there, one of which (I believe) probably drew her greater attention namely in the Supernatural universe of stories.

Early in her career, she found a bit of screen time in incidental roles -- basically background stuff -- in such projects as 1994's Viper telefilm or series such as The Sentinel, Secret Agent Man, or Stargate: SG-1.  But her appearances certainly grew, and it wasn't long before prospects emerged in The Dead Zone, Bloodsuckers (2005), Masters Of Horror, and the much beloved Smallville.  But methinks it was her turn aboard Supernatural in the guise of 'Mary Singer' that probably helped cement her as a bankable prospect for genre producers; and I do see that she also enjoyed a respectable stint aboard The CW's iZombie during its run on the network.  

Our warmest prayers are extended to the family, friends, and fans of Carrie Anne Fleming.

May she rest in peace.

​-- EZ

Imagine – if you will – that Hollywood wanted a return to greatness, the kind of which gets rewarded with both critical and commercial success, and you might imagine a film like Project Hail Mary.
 
For example, Hollywood loves to adapt the bestseller, right?  Strategically, it’s always been a sound strategy because – right out of the gate – they’ve established that there’s a built-in audience wanting to experience this same story in a different fashion.  Well, novelist Andy Weir published the book upon which the film is based back in 2021; and it went on to become a huge hit with readers as well as a finalist for the 2022 Hugo Award in fiction.  Such ‘street cred’ is actually the kind of thing Tinseltown’s movers and shakers ought to be conscious of, so let’s be thankful that in this case the stars aligned as well as they did.
 
Furthermore, studios used to create product fashioned to appeal to the – ahem – W-I-D-E-S-T D-E-M-O-G-R-A-P-H-I-C P-O-S-S-I-B-L-E, thus bolstering their chances for universal success and not merely just – in the words of Star Trek showrunner Alex Kurtzman – appealing to the modern audience.  In other words, making something that is fully intended to appeal to everyone’s sensibilities when it comes to appreciable entertainment arguably places the completed film to captured the hearts and minds of everyone instead of the vastly miniscule 3% or 10% or even 20% of the whatever-is-hot-crowd today that seemingly never quite shows up to event programming.
 
Lastly, imagine what might happen if you tailor the media tour to focus on those same principles, that being to educate the consumers that you’ve made a motion picture intended to be for anyone who still loves going to the multiplex? 
 
Whether or not folks remember this, actor Ryan Gosling – who headlines Project Hail Mary – rather famously offended a significant portion of the potential viewership that could’ve, should’ve, and would’ve celebrated 2018’s First Man – a Neil Armstrong biopic – by insisting that his version of the first man to step onto the moon was (I’m paraphrasing) “a citizen of the world.”  Now, I’m not stupid.  I get what he was trying to do, most likely attempting to lessen the American focus of the space program so that other nations would show up to buy tickets … and yet Armstrong’s fellow astronauts went on record publicly arguing that the man they knew and worked with was decidedly pro-United States.  The flick even refused showing the American flag anywhere, especially in the iconic flag-mounting scene.  Consequently, First Man didn’t even earn back its production budget from U.S. audiences and had to rely on foreign ticket sales to become even a mid-performer.
 
Of course, Project Hail Mary – hereafter PHM – gets all of this right (to a degree).  While never succumbing to what some might suggest is a patriotic film (the nations of the world are united in figuring out a solution to the central problem), there’s no denying that the story is a rallying cry on behalf of all mankind.  Our planet is dying – not (finally) as a result of something we’ve done but a Galactic Mother Nature – and we as a people are thrown together to come up with a solution to avert such a catastrophe.  Ryland Grace (played by Gosling) is a disgraced scientist forced to teach middle school science to just get by in life; but when a former research paper of his catches the eye of Eva Stratt (Sandra Hüller), Grace is picked up and thrown back into the lab where his controversial theory ties into the interstellar creatures who have begun eating the sun.
 
(Additional note to Hollywood, if you’re still reading: how refreshing it was to watch a film wherein We The People weren’t the tale’s villains.)
 
All of this leads to Grace eventually waking up from a medically-induced coma bound for the distant system of Tau Ceti where its star has someone avoided the intergalactic digestion process; and the hope remains that if the scientist can figure out why and communicate it back to Earth then we might rescue ourselves from certain doom.  But given the fact that this was all designed as a suicide mission and the rest of the Hail Mary’s crew died from some cryogenic accident, the man will need to right his spirits first before getting down to the business of saving life as we know it.
 
Where PHM takes its most creative narrative turn is that – because we’re not alone in the universe – another spaceship shows up nearby on the same mission of mercy.  Similar to Grace’s prospects, its crew was also almost entirely wiped out in the trip, leaving a sole astronaut – Rocky – who wishes to complete the task at hand.  As neither characters are trained in diplomacy, their ‘First Contact’ is understandably awkward and occasionally comical; but the two eventually craft enough of a shared language to known that, together, they just might be the last, best hope to avert a disaster of universal proportions.
 
Now, there’s a bit more to the story that this summary – a good portion of which deals with Grace’s personal character arc – but I’d rather not spoil anything that deserves to be witnessed first; and a great deal of PHM definitely should be experienced on the big screen.  No, this isn’t some endorsement of only seeing it in 70MM or Imax or thereabouts.  I’m simply agreeing with what a great many others who talked about the film have already said, that being it’s about as cinematic and/or theatrical experience as pictures come, and that makes it worthy of a trip to the cinema.  PHM is the kind of thing that Hollywood used to do exceedingly well but gave up on a few decades ago to push its propaganda: no, I do not believe they’ll learn any lessons from this, and I firmly believe such fare will continue to be the exception rather than the rule.  There’s no fixing what’s destroyed that town, and I stand by that.
 
However, projects that warrant our collective attention are few and far between; and it’s for this reason that I’m giving my endorsement.  There’s no objectionable language in here.  There are no relationships that might irk those who are sensitive to such things.  In fact, everything in here is entirely tied to the narrative in some way, shape, or form; and I found it refreshing as a change of pace from what accounts for so much of mainstream drivel in circulation.  This is a story wherein you care about the players, and you’re rewarded for having taken part in whatever small way.
 
Strongly Recommended.
 
In the interests of fairness, I’m pleased to disclose that I’m beholden to no one for this review of Project Hail Mary (2026) as I viewed in at my local theater entirely on my own dime.  Imagine that?

-- EZ
​

Alas, folks, I've the sad duty this morning to report that another talented soul has left us far too soon.

Overnight, I saw it reported that actor Nicholas Brendon had passed of causes related to a long-known medical issue, one that had caused him a great deal of pain over the last few years.  For those of you unfamiliar with him, he essentially came to prominence within fandom for his work aboard Buffy The Vampire Slayer (1997-2003) where IMDB.com shows him credited for appearances in a mind-blowing 144 episodes.  Other genre stops included such projects as Children Of The Corn III: Urban Harvest (1995), Psycho Beach Party (2000), Survival Island (2002), Fire Serpent (2007), Unholy (2007), Blood On The Highway (2008), Robot Ninja & Gay Guy, The Portal (2010), Coherence (2013), Attack Of The Morningside Monster (2014), Redwood (2017), The Nanny (2018), Wanton Want (2021), Dawn (2022), and Christmas Slasher (2024).

​Our warmest prayers are extended to the family, friends, and fans of Nicholas Brendon.

May he rest in peace.

-- EZ

So many movies ... so little time ...

On this day in 2022 (in the U.S.), Giantess Battle Attack! enjoyed its first release to interested consumers via the Information Superhighway.  Directed by Jim Wynorski from a story by Kent Roudebush, the film starred Kiersten Hall, Kira Noir, Gail Thackray, and others. 

According to our friends at IMDB.com, here's the plot summary:

"The beautiful, beastly Beverly returns and faces a new gaggle of gargantuan gals, hell bent on achieving deluxe diva domination. Get ready for the cinematic smackdown thrills of Giantess Battle Attack. Size really does matter."

-- EZ

So many movies ... so little time ...

On this day in 1990 (in the U.S.), audiences were afraid to go back into the sorority house when Sorority House Massacre II enjoyed its release.  Directed by Jim Wynorski from a story by J.B. Rogers, Bob Sheridan, and Mark Thomas McGee, the film starred Gail Thackray, Melissa Moore, Stacia Zhivago, and others. 

According to our friends at IMDB.com, here's the plot summary:

"Five college women buy the old Hokstedter place for their new sorority house. They decide to stay in it for the night to meet the movers in the morning, but begin to get the creeps when the weird neighbor starts poking around."

-- EZ

(NOTE: The following review will contain minor spoiler necessary solely for the discussion of plot and/or characters.  If you’re the type of reader who prefers a review entirely spoiler-free, then I’d encourage you to skip down to the last few paragraphs for the final assessment.  If, however, you’re accepting of a few modest hints at ‘things to come,’ then read on …)
 
From the film’s IMDB.com page citation:
“Norman, a young man very much in love with his girlfriend, attends her father's birthday party, held in a hotel where a sect happens to be preparing for the birth of the god it worships.”
 
The utilization of the real-time storytelling format has never – never – had a better exhibition than it got with Fox Television’s stellar Action/Drama 24.  In that award-winning procedural, Counter-Terrorism agent Jack Bauer (played by Kiefer Sutherland) found himself spending the lion’s share of 24 hours battling villains hell bent on bringing America to its knees; and the series even used the ticking clock format to highlight the slowly smoldering currency of time itself being our most precious and most perishable resource.  While the show’s subplots didn’t always work as efficiently, the main premise – the race against moments to prevent a massive catastrophe – was almost always the stuff of fabulous entertainment.
 
Essentially, writer/director Eugenio Mira picked up that framework and straddled it to The Birthday (2004), a hybrid that plucks tropes from a variety of genres but chiefly makes the best use of ones from Horror and Science Fiction.  Instead of giving his tale a full twenty-four hours, Mira wraps everything up – well, yes and no – in what could’ve, would’ve, and should’ve been a lean and mean two hours – well, 117 minutes, but you get the point – but the director along with co-screenwriter Mikel Alvariño could’ve used a primer in maintaining the principal plotline efficiently since this Birthday moves much too slowly and invests in inconsequential screen trickery all too often.
 
Norman Forrester (Corey Feldman) is the ultimate sad sack of the downtrodden schlemiel.  While his heart is undeniably in the right place, he can never seem to speak his mind nor convey the proper sentiments freely; and, as such, he’s always found himself a bit pushed around and/or bullied by those around him, including his incessantly self-centered girlfriend, Alison Fulton (Erica Prior).  But on the cusp of Alison’s father turning another year older, Norman attends the festivities at the wealthy family’s soon-to-be-closed hotel with the intention of finally breaking through all the noise and asking for the young woman’s hand in marriage.  In general screwball Comedy fashion, everything that could go wrong does, and that even includes the attempt of a Lovecraftian-type demon finding a means to open a portal through which it’ll (likely) conquer our world.
 
Wouldn’t you know it?  Why, it’ll be none other than Norman Forrester who’ll stand in its way.
 
Suffice it to say, The Birthday isn’t exactly all that unpredictable.  What works best in here is Feldman’s acting: while such a character rarely if ever is meant to be at the center of a cosmic collapse, that’s entirely why such a satire like this works.  Not unlike those lovable nitwits ‘Ted’ Theordore Logan and Bill S. Preston, Esq. (of the Bill & Ted movie franchise fame) saving our collective tomorrow by time traveling to complete what amounts to a book report, The Birthday embraces the good-natured knucklehead who – by hook or by crook – defies the odds and becomes the hero we never knew we needed much less expected him to be.  Granted, The Birthday lacks Bill & Ted’s sense of fun; but it’s clearly derived from the same moral stomping ground.
 
Where Birthday falls apart, however, is it invests far too much time in the minutiae of Norman’s normal existence, made even less admirable owed to the real-time format.  Viewers are taken on seemingly endless elevator rides and walks down the Fulton Hotel’s corridors or stairwells where nothing happens; so the picture constantly feels as if it’s starting over with Norman’s arrival in a new spot.  Rather than organically flowing together – like the aforementioned 24 did with its labyrinthian plotlines – Birthday chugs and chugs through twists inserted to give our main character something today until the next development arrives.  Even his and Alison’s successive banter seems to ignore the fact that – ahem – they’ve been here before; so why (oh why) do we keep arguing the same core issues?  Is that all life is for these people?  If so, then perhaps they are better off apart as opposed to joined.
 
Stylistically, Mira definitely gives the audience a great deal to distract them from the lack of a central plot (until the second half).  The sets – while colored a bit dour – arguably lend to the aesthetics of a world in need of a facelift – as do the lives of so many characters in this – only hinting here and there at the vivid lushness of a hotel near the peak of its usefulness.  Graphically, the director makes great use of some wide-open spaces still feeling increasingly claustrophobic as things go wrong; and he even manages to squeeze in some great turns and pans in sequences where they’re put to thematic use.  While nothing diverts attention enough from the fact that there just isn’t enough narrative focus to the protracted set-up (a vastly shorter cut of this could’ve had a better chance with finding an audience), the film nonetheless retains the workmanship quality which suggests – if nothing else – better days could be ahead if Mira finds a balance between plot and visuals.
 
But …
 
Without divulging Birthday’s final scene (which I always avoid whenever possible), Mira and Feldman fail to stick the landing here owed entirely to a flawed artistic choice.  Treading as lightly as possible, let me suggest that – ahem – no one goes to, say, watch Babe Ruth swing from home plate at the pitch only to get up and leave when the bat successfully cracks loudly, signaling something grand could’ve happened.  They sit in their seats, and they watch to see whether or not that ball sailed over the wall and into the stands.  That, inevitably, is what everyone can to see.  Mira and Feldman stop short – well short – of delivering a home run – an obvious and deliberate choice – turning what story developed into little more than a joke without a punchline.
 
Sorry, folks, but that’s just no way to treat an audience.
 
Regarding Mira and his opinion of the finished product, he’s clearly happy with this work in much the same way any parent is with a child.  In the extras on the disc, he goes to good lengths discussing the praise he’s received from others in the industry – notably Guillermo del Toro and Jordan Peele – who’ve taken a personal interest in the project and its possible future.  While that’s all well and good, nothing replaces the fact that, sadly, the film is still a bit of an oddity at best – one that arguably never found an audience in its previous time and place – and I’m not sure it’ll find stronger prospects in the here and now.  With some flicks, ‘cult’ is the best it ever gets; and at some point I hope he can find peace with that alone.
 
The Birthday (2004) was produced by Arcadia Motion Pictures and Infinity Films S.L.  DVD distribution (for this particular release) has been coordinated by the fine folks at Arrow Films.  As for the technical specifications?  While I’m no trained video expert, I can still assure the readers that no expense has been spared in giving this one its makeover: the flick both looks and sounds fantastic, and there clearly was a bit of work done in the second half (regarding the audio presentation) that helps to establish the proper mood.  Lastly, if you’re looking for special features?  This being Arrow, there’s no room for disappointment, and the disc is loaded with a commentary from Mira and Feldman (it’s fun in spots, surprising trim in others), an all-new interview with the director, and some other whatnot associated to a 20th anniversary screening. 
 
Alas … only Mildly Recommended.
 
Bobbing and weaving somewhere between Horror, Parody, and Farce, 2004’s The Birthday is – yet again – one of those flicks that resonates respectably well with festival audiences, cinema aficionados, and general film nerds but likely struggled – and always will – to gain traction with general audiences.  Director Mira clearly delivers what no one can deny is a singular vision; but is this birthday a cause for celebration?  Well … perhaps had its excesses been trimmed and its screenplay hammered into something that made cohered better, then it might’ve had a chance at more than the obvious ‘cult’ prospect.  What’s sad about that – so far as it matters – is that the oft-overlooked Hollywood outcast Feldman gives a performance that deserved some attention; but too much of it gets lost in curiously long takes, occasionally incoherent plot twists, and Mira’s insistence on keeping everything moving forward in ‘real time.’  An oddity, at best.
 
In the interests of fairness, I’m pleased to disclose that the fine folks at Arrow Films provided me with a complimentary Blu-ray of The Birthday (2004) by request for the expressed purpose of completing this review.  Their contribution to me in no way, shape, or form influenced my opinion of it.

-- EZ
​