Editor's Note:
Folks, I've told the story before, so please bear with me for new readers. Having written reviews for products for well into three decades, I maintain a mountain of material, much of which was used back in the day when I was an Amazon Top 1,000 Reviewer. Now, these were composed under an entirely different format, meaning that they're not nearly as in-depth compared to what I do today ... and, yet, I hate to see these lost to history entirely. As such, when I have a few free moments I pull one out, dust it off a bit, and reframe it for use here on SciFiHistory.Net. Such is the case here with my reflections on Ghost Of Goodnight Lane ... enjoy ...
Folks, I've told the story before, so please bear with me for new readers. Having written reviews for products for well into three decades, I maintain a mountain of material, much of which was used back in the day when I was an Amazon Top 1,000 Reviewer. Now, these were composed under an entirely different format, meaning that they're not nearly as in-depth compared to what I do today ... and, yet, I hate to see these lost to history entirely. As such, when I have a few free moments I pull one out, dust it off a bit, and reframe it for use here on SciFiHistory.Net. Such is the case here with my reflections on Ghost Of Goodnight Lane ... enjoy ...
I get slagged a lot for either being too easy on films or too picky – which, at the end of the day, can only really mean that there’s no way to please all readers.
In fact, I’ve often spent more time with smaller releases – exactly the kind of film that Ghost Of Goodnight Lane (2014) both is and tries to be – because they’re an affordable and reasonable alternative to the latest bloated-budget craptacular spectacle available for your viewing pleasure (or displeasure) at the multiplexes or your preferred streaming platform. Now, Ghost isn’t perfect – far from it – and here’s the dirty little secret few will tell you: it probably was never meant to be.
You want a little mindless escape for 90 minutes?
Then it’s right up your alley.
(NOTE: The following review will contain minor spoilers necessary solely for the discussion of plot and/or characters. If you’re the type of reader who prefers a review entirely spoiler-free, then I’d encourage you to skip down to the last three paragraphs for my final assessment. If, however, you’re accepting of a few modest hints at ‘things to come,’ then read on …)
From the product packaging:
“In a Dallas film studio the actors and crew of a horror film become the victims of their own bloody horror story. One by one, they are killed off by a vengeful ghost who seems to be re-enacting some of the scariest moments in the history of film. As the director (Billy Zane) and his pretty actresses begin to piece together a forty-year-old puzzle, it may be too late for them all. The key to their freedom is held by a creepy old woman who reveals a murder mystery with a shocking and sinister twist.”
The straight dope is that so very much of Ghost Of Goodnight Lane is handled exactly the way it should be for its intended audiences: everything in it is very tongue-in-cheek camp.
The story as detailed above pokes an awful lot of fun at the conventions of mainstream horror movies, and writer/director Alin Bijan imbues about fifty percent of it with what I’d call an almost ‘Scooby Doo’ vibe. Nothing – or very little of it – is intended to make literal sense. It’s a bit goofy. It’s a bit silly. It isn’t meant to be taken seriously. After all, half the fun charged to your average horror flick is just you watching, sitting patiently in wait for the most likely suspects to become the next victim – and (most definitely) none of it is meant to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with, say, 1942’s Casablanca. This is the world of ghosts and demons and old crones and creepy children and other things that go bump in the night. What you think is Billy Zane’s tired expression for agreeing to star in yet one more direct-to-DVD release is actually Billy Zane – the actor -- acting like a disenfranchised direct-to-DVD film producer/director who’s about at the end of his wits with the (God)damn entertainment business. There’s a difference, you know?
To my delight, Ghost was moderately enjoyable. If you’re paying attention, the script is smart enough to poke holes in half of the ideas it toys with visually; but – out of quintessential respect for the genre – it still manages to serve up more than a fair share of good old-fashioned scares alongside some obvious post-production camera trickery. For example, watch for Zane to misinterpret a video snippet of the young ghost when he cracks, “Is that CGI? I didn’t authorize that!”
The rest of the cast is rounded out by a roster of familiar faces, all who’ve made marks in smaller projects (like that that this film represents). Each turns up, delivers the lines, and (I suspect) had a little fun over a weekend gig. Matt Dallas (TV’s Kyle XY, 2018’s Along Came The Devil) tries to be the calming force behind so much of the chaos. Scream queen Danielle Harris (the Hatchet franchise, 2007’s Halloween, and a great many other chillers) is the good-girl-gone-bad only so far as it makes her capable of paying the rent. Richard Tyson (1987’s underrated Three O’Clock High, 2000’s Battlefield Earth) shows up in the opening segment in a bit meant to set this small affair in motion. And the lovely Lacey Chabert (1998’s Lost In Space and a whole slew of Hallmark movies) – a young lady who only grows more and more fetching with each opportunity – is the good-girl-who-stays-good who is also hell bent on uncovering the mystery behind all of this and bring this Ghost’s glory days to a fitting and timely end.
“In a Dallas film studio the actors and crew of a horror film become the victims of their own bloody horror story. One by one, they are killed off by a vengeful ghost who seems to be re-enacting some of the scariest moments in the history of film. As the director (Billy Zane) and his pretty actresses begin to piece together a forty-year-old puzzle, it may be too late for them all. The key to their freedom is held by a creepy old woman who reveals a murder mystery with a shocking and sinister twist.”
The straight dope is that so very much of Ghost Of Goodnight Lane is handled exactly the way it should be for its intended audiences: everything in it is very tongue-in-cheek camp.
The story as detailed above pokes an awful lot of fun at the conventions of mainstream horror movies, and writer/director Alin Bijan imbues about fifty percent of it with what I’d call an almost ‘Scooby Doo’ vibe. Nothing – or very little of it – is intended to make literal sense. It’s a bit goofy. It’s a bit silly. It isn’t meant to be taken seriously. After all, half the fun charged to your average horror flick is just you watching, sitting patiently in wait for the most likely suspects to become the next victim – and (most definitely) none of it is meant to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with, say, 1942’s Casablanca. This is the world of ghosts and demons and old crones and creepy children and other things that go bump in the night. What you think is Billy Zane’s tired expression for agreeing to star in yet one more direct-to-DVD release is actually Billy Zane – the actor -- acting like a disenfranchised direct-to-DVD film producer/director who’s about at the end of his wits with the (God)damn entertainment business. There’s a difference, you know?
To my delight, Ghost was moderately enjoyable. If you’re paying attention, the script is smart enough to poke holes in half of the ideas it toys with visually; but – out of quintessential respect for the genre – it still manages to serve up more than a fair share of good old-fashioned scares alongside some obvious post-production camera trickery. For example, watch for Zane to misinterpret a video snippet of the young ghost when he cracks, “Is that CGI? I didn’t authorize that!”
The rest of the cast is rounded out by a roster of familiar faces, all who’ve made marks in smaller projects (like that that this film represents). Each turns up, delivers the lines, and (I suspect) had a little fun over a weekend gig. Matt Dallas (TV’s Kyle XY, 2018’s Along Came The Devil) tries to be the calming force behind so much of the chaos. Scream queen Danielle Harris (the Hatchet franchise, 2007’s Halloween, and a great many other chillers) is the good-girl-gone-bad only so far as it makes her capable of paying the rent. Richard Tyson (1987’s underrated Three O’Clock High, 2000’s Battlefield Earth) shows up in the opening segment in a bit meant to set this small affair in motion. And the lovely Lacey Chabert (1998’s Lost In Space and a whole slew of Hallmark movies) – a young lady who only grows more and more fetching with each opportunity – is the good-girl-who-stays-good who is also hell bent on uncovering the mystery behind all of this and bring this Ghost’s glory days to a fitting and timely end.
But … will you remember it next week to recommend to your friends?
Survey says, “Not likely.”
Ghost Of Goodnight Lane (2014) was produced by FTG Media, Media World Studios, and Media World Television. DVD distribution (for this particular release) has been handled by Inception Media Group. As for the technical specifications? While I’m no trained video expert … this is still one smartly assembled piece of work. The producers spared no expense in serving up some high-quality sights and sounds, as well as some modestly impressive digital and in-camera horror effects work. Lastly – if it’s special features you’re looking for – then prepare to be disappointed as there’s nothing extra.
Mildly Recommended.
Sometimes the only way to endorse a movie these days is to offer the simplest explanation possible: (A) it didn’t suck, and (B) it actually kept my interest. There’s nothing wrong with such quality craftsmanship with smaller releases like Ghost Of Goodnight Lane; and that’s precisely why you’re drawn to them when you find them. You give ‘em a chance to ‘wow’ you for 90 minutes, and they either work or not. Trust me when I caution that you could do far worse.
In the interests of fairness, I’m pleased to disclose that the fine folks at Inception Media Group provided me with a DVD copy of Ghost Of Goodnight Lane by request for the expressed purposes of completing this review. Their contribution to me in no way, shape, or form influenced my opinion of it.
-- EZ
Survey says, “Not likely.”
Ghost Of Goodnight Lane (2014) was produced by FTG Media, Media World Studios, and Media World Television. DVD distribution (for this particular release) has been handled by Inception Media Group. As for the technical specifications? While I’m no trained video expert … this is still one smartly assembled piece of work. The producers spared no expense in serving up some high-quality sights and sounds, as well as some modestly impressive digital and in-camera horror effects work. Lastly – if it’s special features you’re looking for – then prepare to be disappointed as there’s nothing extra.
Mildly Recommended.
Sometimes the only way to endorse a movie these days is to offer the simplest explanation possible: (A) it didn’t suck, and (B) it actually kept my interest. There’s nothing wrong with such quality craftsmanship with smaller releases like Ghost Of Goodnight Lane; and that’s precisely why you’re drawn to them when you find them. You give ‘em a chance to ‘wow’ you for 90 minutes, and they either work or not. Trust me when I caution that you could do far worse.
In the interests of fairness, I’m pleased to disclose that the fine folks at Inception Media Group provided me with a DVD copy of Ghost Of Goodnight Lane by request for the expressed purposes of completing this review. Their contribution to me in no way, shape, or form influenced my opinion of it.
-- EZ
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