One of the more pleasant developments in all of Horrordom is that fans of the best chillers and thrillers often end up getting into the entertainment business, hoping to make their own additions to that vast, vast catalogue exploring things to go bump in the night.
And … why shouldn’t they?
While Hollywood craftsmen and storytellers undoubtedly have a gift for spinning their own frights, fans of the Horror genre have invested countless hours in watching both big and low budget productions; and – unlike under categories of films – they’ve come to understand what works and what doesn’t on screens big and small. These fans are practically on a first-name-basis with jump scares. Many of them know how to mix up their own buckets of blood from things found in any household pantry. And I’ll bet even a few more have tinkered with their own gags to the point wherein they’ve filmed something on a video camera or smartphone to pass around amongst friends or maybe even post to the World Wide Web. Because they’re uniquely ‘in the know,’ they often understand how to approach the foundational elements of mythmaking – imitation is the highest form of flattery, don’t you know – so why shouldn’t they take their shot at securing a place in film history?
Certainly, that’s what writer/director Adam Green did. As a fanatic of all things gruesome, this award-winning talent had probably watched enough Horror flicks to grasp what he needed; and – in 2006 – his Hatchet was hatched on unsuspecting audiences. This blood-spattered fable of Victor Crowley – a deformed Louisiana swamp dweller grown into dreadful proportions – set the stage for a small stable of features wherein the usual cast of dead meat roamed the countryside waiting for their respective moments to meet some horrendous demise. It may not have been the perfect first picture, but it was perfect enough to establish both Green and Crowley with reputations in the industry, meaning that audiences would be wise to keep their eyes peeled for more to come from this dynamic duo.
Why … it was as if their very lives depended upon it!
(NOTE: The following review will contain minor spoilers necessary solely for the discussion of plot and/or character. If you’re the type of reader who prefers a review entirely spoiler-free, then I’d encourage you to skip down to the last few paragraphs for the final assessment. If, however, you’re accepting of a few modest hints at ‘things to come,’ then read on …)
From the film’s IMDB.com page citation:
“When a group of tourists in a New Orleans haunted swamp tour find themselves stranded in the wilderness, their evening of fun and spooks turns into a horrific nightmare.”
And … why shouldn’t they?
While Hollywood craftsmen and storytellers undoubtedly have a gift for spinning their own frights, fans of the Horror genre have invested countless hours in watching both big and low budget productions; and – unlike under categories of films – they’ve come to understand what works and what doesn’t on screens big and small. These fans are practically on a first-name-basis with jump scares. Many of them know how to mix up their own buckets of blood from things found in any household pantry. And I’ll bet even a few more have tinkered with their own gags to the point wherein they’ve filmed something on a video camera or smartphone to pass around amongst friends or maybe even post to the World Wide Web. Because they’re uniquely ‘in the know,’ they often understand how to approach the foundational elements of mythmaking – imitation is the highest form of flattery, don’t you know – so why shouldn’t they take their shot at securing a place in film history?
Certainly, that’s what writer/director Adam Green did. As a fanatic of all things gruesome, this award-winning talent had probably watched enough Horror flicks to grasp what he needed; and – in 2006 – his Hatchet was hatched on unsuspecting audiences. This blood-spattered fable of Victor Crowley – a deformed Louisiana swamp dweller grown into dreadful proportions – set the stage for a small stable of features wherein the usual cast of dead meat roamed the countryside waiting for their respective moments to meet some horrendous demise. It may not have been the perfect first picture, but it was perfect enough to establish both Green and Crowley with reputations in the industry, meaning that audiences would be wise to keep their eyes peeled for more to come from this dynamic duo.
Why … it was as if their very lives depended upon it!
(NOTE: The following review will contain minor spoilers necessary solely for the discussion of plot and/or character. If you’re the type of reader who prefers a review entirely spoiler-free, then I’d encourage you to skip down to the last few paragraphs for the final assessment. If, however, you’re accepting of a few modest hints at ‘things to come,’ then read on …)
From the film’s IMDB.com page citation:
“When a group of tourists in a New Orleans haunted swamp tour find themselves stranded in the wilderness, their evening of fun and spooks turns into a horrific nightmare.”
In fairness, I’ve always cautioned readers that – when it comes to Horror – practically any Tom, Dick, Harry, Jan, Marcia, or Cindy can make such a picture. The advent of home video – a craze started in the 1980’s and perfected not long after the advent of smartphones – meant that anyone could dabble in creating such pressure cookers. Start with an active imagination, set up a respectable premise, and throw in a relative number of homegrown special effects; and the sky was truly the limit. Anyone and everyone could give it the ‘sailor’s try,’ and – quite frankly – I’ve experienced a good deal of modestly-budgeted capers that have made for a great 90-minutes of viewing.
Adam Green’s Hatchet is exactly the kind of thing I’m talking about. While it arguably had more capital invested in the process of bringing it from the storyboards to the cineplexes, the film still retains that independent feel – the kind most folks call ‘guerilla filmmaking’ – while balancing out scenes with a better-than-average cast along with some impressive practical make-up effects that, sadly, studios just don’t give fans all that much any longer. None of this praise is intended to suggest that Hatchet is perfect because that’s far from the truth; still, the flick accomplishes a great deal on the back of its sheer enthusiasm, making it arguably worthy of the buzz it received from fans and the film festival circuit of its day.
Ben (played by Joel David Moore) is presently a ‘sad sack’ of a human being. Recently, his girlfriend broke up with him, sending the man spiraling into the sadness most associated with a broken heart. Hoping to lift Ben’s spirits, Marcus (Deon Richmond) drags him basically kicking and screaming to New Orleans – a place where such national treasures as boobs, beer, and beads rule the days of Mardi Gras on a regular basis. Unable to shake himself from the funk, Ben insists they try something different; and the two – after some argument – settle into a ghost tour of the city. But when their pontoon boat runs aground deep in the Louisiana Bayou, they find themselves – along with the other tourists – running for their dear lives from Victor Crowley, a veritable swamp demon whose daily pursuits consists of dismembering any and all he finds lost in the murk.
Now, Horrors – by the very nature – are uncomplicated affairs. Yes, it’s true that they’re formulaic, subsisting mainly on ratcheting up tension with the sometimes-ferocious depiction of the untimeliest demises caught on film. Audiences get introduced to the players – usually an assortment of stereotypes ranging from good to bad to (well) ugly – and it becomes clear fairly early on who of them might outlast others in the bid to escape death’s door. Hatchet is no different – yes, it’s pretty clear that Ben is destined to see the final reel, and it’s pretty easy to suggest that Marybeth Dunstan (Amara Zaragoza) is destined to pair up with him for the duration of their time as prey – and that’s probably the film’s biggest strength. It never strays too far from the predictability of its ideas and the capabilities of its players. Comfort food being what it is, one might argue that Horror is ‘comfort food’ for the eyes, and Hatchet digests about as easily as does anything similar.
Along with this accessibility, however, the film suffers from the usual weaknesses.
Adam Green’s Hatchet is exactly the kind of thing I’m talking about. While it arguably had more capital invested in the process of bringing it from the storyboards to the cineplexes, the film still retains that independent feel – the kind most folks call ‘guerilla filmmaking’ – while balancing out scenes with a better-than-average cast along with some impressive practical make-up effects that, sadly, studios just don’t give fans all that much any longer. None of this praise is intended to suggest that Hatchet is perfect because that’s far from the truth; still, the flick accomplishes a great deal on the back of its sheer enthusiasm, making it arguably worthy of the buzz it received from fans and the film festival circuit of its day.
Ben (played by Joel David Moore) is presently a ‘sad sack’ of a human being. Recently, his girlfriend broke up with him, sending the man spiraling into the sadness most associated with a broken heart. Hoping to lift Ben’s spirits, Marcus (Deon Richmond) drags him basically kicking and screaming to New Orleans – a place where such national treasures as boobs, beer, and beads rule the days of Mardi Gras on a regular basis. Unable to shake himself from the funk, Ben insists they try something different; and the two – after some argument – settle into a ghost tour of the city. But when their pontoon boat runs aground deep in the Louisiana Bayou, they find themselves – along with the other tourists – running for their dear lives from Victor Crowley, a veritable swamp demon whose daily pursuits consists of dismembering any and all he finds lost in the murk.
Now, Horrors – by the very nature – are uncomplicated affairs. Yes, it’s true that they’re formulaic, subsisting mainly on ratcheting up tension with the sometimes-ferocious depiction of the untimeliest demises caught on film. Audiences get introduced to the players – usually an assortment of stereotypes ranging from good to bad to (well) ugly – and it becomes clear fairly early on who of them might outlast others in the bid to escape death’s door. Hatchet is no different – yes, it’s pretty clear that Ben is destined to see the final reel, and it’s pretty easy to suggest that Marybeth Dunstan (Amara Zaragoza) is destined to pair up with him for the duration of their time as prey – and that’s probably the film’s biggest strength. It never strays too far from the predictability of its ideas and the capabilities of its players. Comfort food being what it is, one might argue that Horror is ‘comfort food’ for the eyes, and Hatchet digests about as easily as does anything similar.
Along with this accessibility, however, the film suffers from the usual weaknesses.
Green’s script never quite tackles the challenge of explaining why these folks probably couldn’t find their way out of a paper bag. As one who has been lost in the wilderness (hiking be damned), I can tell you that there are still ways and means to recognizing that you’re going in a circle; but no one in this cast of characters was apparently up to the task. Of course, the fact that this excursion into the swamp took place at night complicates matters to a greater degree; but none of that excuses the fact that – ahem – this was quite possibly one of the best lit nighttime shoots I’ve ever seen in a Horror film. In fact, one might argue that there’s far too much clarity in some scenes, and that kinda/sorta ruins the aesthetic of this supposedly being a group of people lost in the dark in a highly uncharacteristic setting. I’ll chalk that artistic choice up to being a beginner’s error.
Yet, because all of this was so well lit – props to the production crew, by the way – it really defies logic as to how Crowley – a big and lumbering menace who’d give Jason Voorhees a run for his money – could sneak up on the men and women. Sadly, there’s a scene wherein the demon literally pops up, screaming, gesticulating, etc.; and – when the camera pans back quickly – it becomes clear that he must’ve crawled up to them on his hands and knees in this perfect clearing while no one saw him coming. Why? Why do that? None of them are his physical equal. Even together, they couldn’t stand toe-to-toe. He’s a behemoth, and they’re all small fries. If the only reason was to manufacture the resulting jump scare (on the audience), then (again) I’ll have to chalk that up to another beginner’s mistake.
Ultimately, that’s the problem with Hatchet: it always aims for the middle ground, and it accepts such territory without ever trying to be anything greater. As good as Crowley’s background is (and it is interesting), he – as a villain – winds up being shackled in an entirely normal procedural, one wherein he’s going to spend a lot of time chasing idiots, jumping out of the dark, screeching and howling his delight, and – inevitably – winning the day in a closing scene that’s a bit too reminiscent of Friday The 13th’s ending. A bit of extra effort could’ve given the franchise an even greater start, but – alas – it would seem that ‘good enough’ was ‘good enough’ while I’m the type of fan who wanted something just a tad bit extra.
Hatchet (2006) was produced by ArieScope Pictures, High Seas Entertainment, Radioaktive Film. DVD distribution (for this particular release) has been coordinated by the fine folks at Dark Sky Films. As for the technical specifications? While I’m no trained video expert, I found the flicks provided sights-and-sounds to be exceptional – perhaps even too good in some spots as too much clarity kinda/sorta spoils the Horror, if you ask me – from start to finish. Lastly, as for the special features? To the distributor’s credit, there are some excellent making-of shorts assembled here – perhaps a necessary evil considering the first film was the start of an all-new franchise – along with the usual gag reel, interviews, and theatrical trailers. It’s a solid assortment for die-hard enthusiasts. Well done!
Recommended.
Enthusiasm carries the day in the arduously formulaic Hatchet (2006). It isn’t a great outing, but it’s the kind of harmless Horror affair one might discover on cable and watch because there’s nothing else up against it. As a first picture, it’s well made – not exactly a winning endorsement, I realize – and it establishes a new threat to mankind that needs to be dealt with. Still, there’s an irrepressible sameness to all too much of it, leaving me wishing that everyone involved had tried harder than just twisting off skulls, shattering spines, and tearing off limbs. Besides, haven’t we seen that before?
In the interests of fairness, I’m pleased to disclose that the fine folks at Dark Sky Films provided me with a Blu-ray copy of Hatchet: The Complete Collection by request for the expressed purpose of completing this review. Their contribution to me in no way, shape, or form influenced my opinion of it.
-- EZ
Yet, because all of this was so well lit – props to the production crew, by the way – it really defies logic as to how Crowley – a big and lumbering menace who’d give Jason Voorhees a run for his money – could sneak up on the men and women. Sadly, there’s a scene wherein the demon literally pops up, screaming, gesticulating, etc.; and – when the camera pans back quickly – it becomes clear that he must’ve crawled up to them on his hands and knees in this perfect clearing while no one saw him coming. Why? Why do that? None of them are his physical equal. Even together, they couldn’t stand toe-to-toe. He’s a behemoth, and they’re all small fries. If the only reason was to manufacture the resulting jump scare (on the audience), then (again) I’ll have to chalk that up to another beginner’s mistake.
Ultimately, that’s the problem with Hatchet: it always aims for the middle ground, and it accepts such territory without ever trying to be anything greater. As good as Crowley’s background is (and it is interesting), he – as a villain – winds up being shackled in an entirely normal procedural, one wherein he’s going to spend a lot of time chasing idiots, jumping out of the dark, screeching and howling his delight, and – inevitably – winning the day in a closing scene that’s a bit too reminiscent of Friday The 13th’s ending. A bit of extra effort could’ve given the franchise an even greater start, but – alas – it would seem that ‘good enough’ was ‘good enough’ while I’m the type of fan who wanted something just a tad bit extra.
Hatchet (2006) was produced by ArieScope Pictures, High Seas Entertainment, Radioaktive Film. DVD distribution (for this particular release) has been coordinated by the fine folks at Dark Sky Films. As for the technical specifications? While I’m no trained video expert, I found the flicks provided sights-and-sounds to be exceptional – perhaps even too good in some spots as too much clarity kinda/sorta spoils the Horror, if you ask me – from start to finish. Lastly, as for the special features? To the distributor’s credit, there are some excellent making-of shorts assembled here – perhaps a necessary evil considering the first film was the start of an all-new franchise – along with the usual gag reel, interviews, and theatrical trailers. It’s a solid assortment for die-hard enthusiasts. Well done!
Recommended.
Enthusiasm carries the day in the arduously formulaic Hatchet (2006). It isn’t a great outing, but it’s the kind of harmless Horror affair one might discover on cable and watch because there’s nothing else up against it. As a first picture, it’s well made – not exactly a winning endorsement, I realize – and it establishes a new threat to mankind that needs to be dealt with. Still, there’s an irrepressible sameness to all too much of it, leaving me wishing that everyone involved had tried harder than just twisting off skulls, shattering spines, and tearing off limbs. Besides, haven’t we seen that before?
In the interests of fairness, I’m pleased to disclose that the fine folks at Dark Sky Films provided me with a Blu-ray copy of Hatchet: The Complete Collection by request for the expressed purpose of completing this review. Their contribution to me in no way, shape, or form influenced my opinion of it.
-- EZ
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